Sunday, April 8, 2007

Smoke-like Figure

Friday, April 6, 2007 nag-Station of the Cross kami ni Mommy. Meeting place and location ng First Station sa Archdiocesan Shrine of Our Lady of Guadalupe our Parish Church. I’ve got blistered feet from walking napaso pa ang kamay ko sa mga patak ng kandila…my legs hurt…malamang naman diba ikaw ba naman maglakad ka for 3 hours straight!

When the day is done there is nothing left for me to do but sit on the couch and watch tv since I have no one to talk to…my parents went out and my brother’s out with his friends…it’s late and I’m too lazy to go online… Mom called and told me that my bro’s sleeping over at his friend’s house and that I should just lock the doors…which of course I did and checked ‘em thrice! I decided to sleep in my parents’ room so that I could hear if anyone knocks…just in case my brother decided to come home. I popped in my parents’ compilation of 60’s songs CD and tried to get some sleep...to no avail.

At first it was because of the light coming from the lamp post outside…aninag kasi yun sa malaking bintana sa kwarto nila Mommy...plus yung moon pa ang liwa-liwanag! I didn’t mind yung mga nagpapasyon eh ok lang sakin yung noise but I really couldn’t sleep pag may konting liwanag sa kwarto. Kailangan talaga total darkness.

So I decided to cover my eyes na lang…di pa rin ako makatulog…what’s my problem?! I used to sleep that way nung ka-share ko pa si Ate sa kwarto when I have to put up with her reading during late nights at bukas pa ilaw…shining brightly right in front of my face since double deck yung bed namin ata ko yung nasa itaas… Binuksan ko na lang yung lamp shade…nagmuni-muni...wa epek! So I decided to turn the music off and the lamp shade…I tried to sleep.

Wala pang five minutes I felt weird na…uneasy. Wala naman akong naririnig na kahit na anong ingay, it’s just that I felt like I was being watched! How can that be?! Hello! Mag-isa lang ako sa kwarto…mag-isa lang ako sa bahay!!! Dali-dali kong binuksan yung lamp shade reached for my cell phone and texted my friend Ai. Thankfully, she’s still up and nag-reply cya! Made me feel a better! I didn’t tell her anything since I didn’t want to acknowledge the feeling! Geez, I am so used to seeing things that normal people don’t usually see…ngayon pa ba ako matatakot…now that I am older?! What’s gotten into me?!

Sa harap ng bed nila Mommy may mirror…although di ko kita ang sarili ko kita ko yung wall above my head…again…andun na naman yung uneasy feeling nung mapatingin ako sa salamin…I decided to ignore it at sige lang ako ng text kay Ai…pero the feeling of uneasiness is getting stronger and something inside is urging me to look at the mirror once again…so I did. I stared at the mirror I could see the light‘s reflection…okay lang normal lang yun! But all of a sudden yung reflection gumalaw…it’s forming into something…it’s like a smoke forming into something…pinatay ko agad yung lamp shade tumingin ako sa may bintana to see if there’s something outside. Wala naman. Although natatakot ako tumingin ako uli sa may salamin…telling myself, “baka naman guni-guni ko lang yun!”

Trying to calm myself down slowly I looked into that direction…there was nothing! Fixing my eyes on that same direction I saw the smoke-like figure rise up above…nasa tabi na cya ng ilaw…I closed my eyes and prayed. Telling myself it was just my imagination…only my imagination…I remembered the prayer that my Mom thought me when I was still a kid…nung madalas akong tumatakbo sa room nila dahil di ko na kaya yung mga bagay na nagpapakita sa akin noon…she told me to pray to Jesus…pati yung mga sinabi ni Father Jocis sa book niyang “Exorcism” naalala ko! Nakatulugan ko na yata ang pagdadasal…pero umaga na rin kasi nun kaya nakatulog na rin ako…finally my parents came home na. I tried to forget all about it went on my biz the next day. I didn’t even tell my Mom.

Kinagabihan umalis uli sila ng Dad ko but this time hindi na ako mag-isa coz my bro’s here. I stayed up pa nga til midnight watching tv sa living room tapos dun uli ako natulog sa room nila Mommy. Papasok pa lang ako sa room nila naiisip ko na naman yung mga nangyari the other night…I tried to shake it off na lang. Same routine…pinakinggan ko uli yung 60’s CD nila covered my eyes and tried to sleep…but to no avail. I texted Ai…nilibang ko uli sarili ko, but nothing’s good enough…di pa rin ako dalawin ng antok. Pinatay ko na uli yung sounds ko & concentrate on getting some sleep…but the moment I closed my eyes…naramdaman ko agad yung mga “matang” nakatingin sa akin…at parang mas madami sila kaysa the other night! I opened my eyes and saw that smoke-like figure again…I tried to pray but this time I was defeated by fear! Di ko matapos-tapos yung dinadasal ko...biglang di ko na alam yung sasabihin ko…I started to panic…

I decided to reach for my cell phone to text or call someone…disappointed to find out na it’s not possible since I lost my fone…I lost all my contacts at di ko pa nakokopya yung mga nasa chikka ko…I guess all that stress made me pass out for a couple of minutes…nagising kasi ako almost 4am sa ingay ng aso naming…he kept barking for some reason…when I opened my eyes and looked above the figure wasn’t there anymore…I looked around and saw it by the door and it moved! I looked at the window to see if there’s someone outside but there was no one. So why the hell is the dog barking?!

I played some music to calm my nerves but it didn’t work…the strong presence of the smoke-like figure is overwhelming! Plus the dog’s barking didn’t help at all! Inisip ko rin yung possibility na baka may magnanakaw somewhere so ayun nakuha kong tumayo at buksan na ang ilaw. But our dog kept barking! I felt so scared na and helpless kaya umupo na lang ako sa isang corner na malayo sa bintana and hugged my pillow…praying. After some time nanahimik na rin yung aso namin…I stood up, put the light off & hopped into bed.

The minute I close my eyes it came back…the feeling of being watched…and the smoke-like figure…I was about to cry nang bigla kong maalala yung El Shaddai na pinakikinggan lagi ng Mom ko noon sa radio…I remembered puro worship songs ang kinakanta dun…since I can’t pray the worship songs would surely calm my nerves. So I turned the radio on kaso lang naisip ko, “what if di ko mahanap, or what if tapos na yung program?!” Buti na lang pag-on ko ng radio andun na agad sa Station nayun at nung marinig ko boses ni Brother Mike na nagbabasa ng verse sa Bible I started to calm down na…nakatulog na ako with the radio on.